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Dichotomy

by Polaris

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1.
Inertia: Choose to be left in the wake or push against the grain, against all you took comfort from. The unpredictable movements of life can tear away even the firmest cornerstone. Left here to gather the scattered pieces of what we have, we cling to solace in the promise that one day this will make sense. The brightest flames will always be the ones to burn out first. I cannot fill this emptiness. The ground is falling from under me. We lose ourselves in our regret. We’re holding on to a memory. So burn your paper heart. Send it skywards to the clouds. In the smoke and burning embers, make a tribute to the lost. I stand before you for all who’ve ever grieved, and all who have suffered: This too shall pass. It took all of my strength to come to terms with this. Their silence haunts my thoughts no longer. Dearly beloved gathered here. Dearly departed, forever near. In hearts and minds of those you leave behind, your names will live beyond your graves. I am the product of everyone I’ve ever known. I am their life stories. I am the places they call home. I am the places that they call home.
2.
Aspirations 03:56
I’ve spent my life chasing ambitions that were just beyond my reach, just to feel so disenchanted as potential fell to waste. But still I tremble at the thought of my unaccomplished aims, knowing all my best laid plans might leave me reeling and empty handed. Vicious circles are a false sense of progression. Every wrong turn one step further from my goal, furthering the distance in my mind. The path less travelled is one I’ve feared to walk, but hesitation is a dead end road. It seems I’ve always run away. Turned my back on uncertainty (Never dared to face my own worst fears). A life spent being led astray will never amount to anything, until my reflection shows me that the hands that held me back are none but my own. My heart will never be another unrequited dream. I’ll travel the earth and seas to find a heart that beats for me. And though the winds will change, I’ll find new strength to fill my sails, each growing breath one final push to carry me home. Searching for so long just to find what was right in front of me all this time. It takes so much just to open up your eyes. And when you feel like you're alone, look for strength to find your way back home and carry on. Nothing comes of apathy.
3.
Deliverance 03:56
Stay safe in your skin. You can’t ignore the itch that creeps in. Stick to your senses. This flesh, a rusted cage, now tear it off. Shed this withered shell like the snake that you’ve become. Your mouth holds a devil’s tongue that whispers liquid lies to thirsty ears who drink your poison words. You’ve always reaped but never sown a single seed: You’ll never fucking grow. You will never fucking grow at all. You will never fucking grow. Now I know this time, your colours will fade to black and white. It’ll take some time for every trace to fade. I’ll web my way inside your mind, I’ll creep around cocooning myself deep into your thoughts. In every vision I will be lurking in the background. Every memory will be laced and tainted. If you were bound to me, you’d be my misery, but I’d be your end. This time your colours will fade to black and white. It’ll take some time for every trace to fade. Now I know this time, your colours will fade to black and white. It’ll take some time for every trace to fade. These eyes have seen so much pain – how could you be so blind? It’ll take some time for every trace to fade. If you were bound to me, you’d be my misery, but I’d be your end.
4.
The Undertow 04:50
No words that spill from your mouth could overcome the ringing in my ears. The blood is pounding in my temples and it deafens me, engulfs my thoughts. After waiting and wishing for so many years, I have turned back the clocks, trying to fill the hole that was left. But an empty heart could never fill one so pure. This was never my intention: a future not of my invention. This was never my intention: I feel it coming to a close. And now I’ve seen the end of all I’ve known. My chest is sinking like a stone. I’ll wait for the numbness to set in, and hope I’ll never feel again. It’s getting harder to face the truth, but my frustration is fruitless. I can’t decide for you. I can’t decipher you. And as I’m getting older, I’m starting to believe that there is nothing on this earth that measures up to what you need. When every future is a tempest in an unrelenting sea, and every consolation seems so hollow, it all seems so false to me. As the years keep slipping by, the voices racing through my head will always keep me up at night. From the ashes with these broken hands, I will rebuild my life. This time I won’t look back. My heart was always in the right place. And now I’ve seen the end of all I’ve known. My chest is sinking like a stone. I’ll wait for the numbness to set in, and hope I’ll never feel. Again I find myself alone, and I just sink like a stone.
5.
In Parallel 03:38
The past has proven, through days gone by, those fed by cruel hands seem to sharpen their teeth for the bite, while below the skin lies potential to choose a greater path. Realise your actions hold consequence, and for each misguided step you take, someone must bear the weight. Compromise is never something I’d take lightly. Cauterise the wounds and let the scars speak for themselves. Burgeoning, I’ve come to terms with an imperfect past, knowing when our lives diverged my friend, you chose the wrong path. Carve these words into stone: I have waited patiently for this time. I will leave behind a legacy. The weak willed will rupture and break. Compromise is never something I’d take lightly. Cauterise the wounds and let the scars speak for themselves. I will be the change that is needed. I will be the foundation stone.
6.
This narrative begins at a point in time in this unfamiliar reality, where you have been defined not as you were, but as what you’ve become: a brother to all, but a son to no one. I was once not unlike you. Benign and beaten down, I scoured the corners of the earth in search of a better way. I ploughed the furthest depths, myriad leagues below, and where you found that sinking feeling, that’s where I found myself. I told myself that there was nothing there for me, ensnared within a vacancy that only I could see. Each step I ever took was a vow never to return to that place I left, in search of what I always lacked: My security. I know this desperation breeds acceptance of any alternative, so I made a promise to myself that I won’t break. Meet me at the turning point, I’ll be waiting there for you my friend. Give me strength. Give me a new mentality. Give me hope. Meet me at the turning point, I’ll be waiting there. Give me strength. Give me a new mentality. And give me hope.

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released November 29, 2013

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Polaris Sydney, Australia

POLARIS is a five-piece metalcore band from Sydney's south.

Email: polarisbandofficial@gmail.com

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